A growing sentiment on social media is advising people that the best way not to get hurt is to expect nothing. Perhaps that is somewhat true because a sure way to get nothing in life is to expect nothing.
Expectancy is a key component to faith and opportunity. We can never be prepared for the fullness of what it is we desire if we never have an expectation for what it is we want. Expectancy is essentially a synonym for faith. “…It is impossible to please God without faith,” as found in Hebrews 11:6.
Always have faith (expect) that your present situation will not last. Speak what you desire your end result to be and understand that it could be anything. Whether it be professional elevation, finding a significant other, or even a material item, know that expectancy is essential to receiving it. A leading motivation in life should be to expect greater glories with each passing day.
Now, remaining truthful, disappointment is unavoidable. Still, there are ways we can manage that feeling and perhaps avoid it altogether. First, it is important to be honest with yourself. Understand that you cannot change people. Accepting this truth is not disappointment but just being realistic.
It is crucial to qualify a person’s role in your life. Once you do that, you can see what standard is set for them and act accordingly. Please be aware that you and the other person must have a consensus as to what his or her qualification is. It cannot be a one-way fantasy.
If you are “talking to someone” (light, non-platonic interactions but not necessarily intercourse) and you want a commitment, be real with yourself as to whether or not your standards are met and if the person of interest is in agreement.
Ironically, romantic relationships are amongst the easiest to qualify because actions provide the evidence as opposed to any words. When you see the truth, there is no harm and no foul. Accept what a person can or cannot give you while maintaining the fullness of who you individually are.
We also forge relationships in the workplace and naturally with family. For young professionals, mentors can be incredibly helpful in guiding a career path. Still, this relationship has to be qualified. Do not be afraid to ask someone to mentor you. A person cannot assume how you might need assistance. Ensure that you have shown that you appreciate the time they have taken to groom you. But if none of this has been established, there really are no hurt feelings to be had.
Family is not optional, especially not parents and children. Despite the bonds brought through DNA, familial relations do not eradicate a person’s weaknesses. Maybe one of the hardest things to accept is how deeply you can love a person but realize he or she has significant emotional limitations.
These blocks can range from lack of affection, being overprotective, having control issues, cynicism, undependability, or poor emotional management. The goal is any instance is not to automatically relegate your relatives to the back of your mind but rather how to show love while accepting that their trait for them, and not you, to change. Possibly, it may never change, and that could be the toughest reality.
Love has a way of making someone else’s burden my burden. Free yourself and realize that you cannot carry someone else’s yolk on his or her journey. We often become disappointed because we wait to see when a person will notice how these flaws have made life arduous for both the individual and other family members. Please accept that this discovery is not for you to absolve.
So never stop expecting. Instead, streamline what it is you expect. Do not be afraid to voice what you want. Follow patterns and not words. Understand what issue is out of your reach and do not feel like a failure because of it. Every problem is not designed for us to solve.
Remain firm in your expectancy as to strengthen your dependency on God and to increase the reach of your blessings.